Oh that demon within. Can you make yourself known? When the switch flips south and light exits the room you attack my thoughts without mercy. Your resolve and will is destructive. You drive your ambitions deep down into my soul. And there I lay, the monster having its way, playing around within me like a wrecking ball. You exist in all of my doubt about life and tear me apart the more I really try and run from you.
But I'll fight no longer, only to warmly embrace your presence. Does this baffle you? Does this make you weep at the thought of the grip you once had that exists no longer? You held onto me so perfect and so tight due to my disability to see that it was the battle increased your strength. Like quicksand I sunk the more I moved. But like I said before, I embrace the darkness now.
Things have changed. I will see clearly now that darkness can deliver light. There’s no fear in this heart anymore regarding you showing up. Why? Because… you are here…right here deep inside of me. Not walled out from me any more. Not pushed away. Just here with me. Present. Really present.
I am truly mindful of what you really are and who you turned me into. I’m not attempting to fool anyone any longer by showing them a smile on my face. No, I should just be myself. So I tip my cap to you to all those times you cut me down. Now, let’s go for a walk and work this thing out. I'd like to hear what you say about all those years of the past. How proud are you? How much fun did you have? Are you proud of your accomplishments? Maybe… I can even clap to your success?
But we are moving on and this is the birth of a long relationship. I’m going to start speaking with you for the first time. But now, my life choices are based primarily on light. It’s time to begin to live my life and make the best choices I am able to. But I know that I must check in with you…oh harsh devil deep within. You can show me an untraveled path that absolutely is worth exploring in of its own. You can show me places I’ve always been afraid to go. But to ignore you further would be out of stupidity. Stupidity. Fear.
So let’s go for a walk. I would like to hear what you have got to say.
Evan Sanders is the author of The Words Of Encouragement a website dedicated to spreading encouraging words to everyone who visits and giving them a reason to continue chasing after their dreams. If you are stuck in a rough place, perhaps dealing with that devil within right now, please read these quotes about depression. They will help. A lot.